The Good an the Bad

Pride is insidiously deceptive. I have discovered that even when I do what is good and right I am prone to self-centeredness. This reality was graphically illustrated to me recently while listening to Robert Lewis Stevenson's The Strange case of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. In reflecting on my own life, it turns out that the case was not so strange after all.

Dr. Jekyll comes to the self-discovery that he has two opposing impulses at work within him: good and evil. Furthermore, his bad nature is holding his good nature back. And so, he develops a potion that can separate the good from the bad. His intention is to free the good self from the influence of the bad self and then he will be able to accomplish all of his good goals. However, upon taking the potion, he comes to the realization that his bad side is far more evil than he expected and he is irresistibly drawn to the evil more than the good. He says,

"I knew myself, at the first breath of this new life, to be more wicked, tenfold more wicked, sold a slave to my original evil; and the thought in that moment, braced and delighted me like wine . . . [Edward Hyde's] every act and thought centered on self."

Dr. Jekyll's confession reminds me of the Apostle Paul's struggle and my own: "I am unspiritual, sold as a slave to sin. I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. . . . I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing." (Romans 7:14-15, 17-18).

Jekyll, determined to overcome his evil inclinations of self-centeredness and pride, resolves not to take the potion anymore. He devotes himself to charity and good works in an attempt to defeat his selfish nature and atone for the wrong Edward Hyde has done.

However, something strange happens while he is alone on a park bench reflecting on all the good he has been doing and how much better a man he was than most people.

"I resolved in my future conduct to redeem the past; and I can say with honesty that my resolve was fruitful of some good. You know how earnestly, in the last months of the last year, I labored to relieve suffering; you know that much was done for others. . . . [But as] I smiled, comparing myself with other men, comparing my active good will with the lazy cruelty of their neglect . . . at the very moment of that vain-glorious thought, a qualm came over me, a horrid nausea and the most dreadful shuddering. . . . I looked down. . . . I was once more Edward Hyde."

For the first time Jekyll becomes Hyde without the potion. This realization that he is unable to control his transformations leads him to despair and suicide. Why would Jekyll become Hyde without the potion? Like so many of us, Jekyll knows he is a sinner, so he tries desperately to cover his sin with good works. Yet his efforts do not actually diminish his pride and self-centeredness, they only aggravate it. They stir up within him prejudice, self-righteousness and pride. The transformation occurs because of his goodness.

The good news is that there is a powerful principle available to overcome the deceitfulness of self-righteousness - it is through the renewing power of the Spirit of God. Jesus Christ has broken the bondage of sin and death upon our lives by his death and resurrection. By grace he has imparted his righteousness to us by the presence of his Spirit in our lives. "Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death." (Romans 8:1-2).

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To be clever enough to get all the money, one must be stupid enough to want it. (G.K.Chesterton) (1 Timothy 6:10)

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Spend some time in a cemetery. It will remind you of your own mortality. (Psalm 39:5)

Easter Morning Sunrise in Edmonton

We had some time off while we were in Edmonton on Easter Sunday. So we went to a church with a big enough parking lot to park our rig. God blessed us as we worshiped at North Point Community Church. He even had a trucker sit right beside us.

My King Lives. Do You Know Him?

If I Had Only Known You Better

Lord, I crawled across the barrenness

To You with my empty cup

Uncertain of asking

any small drop of refreshment.

If only I had known You better

I'd have come running with a bucket.

Nancy Spiegelberg & Dorothy Purdy in Fanfare: A Celebration of Belief

Is God Self-Centered?

I have struggled with this question. God demands that his creatures give Him undivided worship and yet, when we humans have the desire for personal glory, He condemns us for being self-absorbed. The only way I have been able to justify this command is that He alone is worthy of such loyalty as the supreme being in the whole universe. All life finds its origin in Him, therefore all life should look to Him with complete devotion.

In reading Tim Keller's book, The Reason for God, he has helped me to see that I have understood this question simply from a monotheistic perspective. "Christianity alone among the world faiths, teaches that God is triune. the doctrine of the Trinity is that God is one being who exists eternally in three persons: Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. The trinity means that God is, in essence, relational."

The Scripture describes these three persons living eternally in a community of mutual honour and joy. John especially paints a portrait of intimacy within the divine community (1:18; 16:14; 17:4-5). What does John mean when he says that the Father, Son, and Holy spirit glorify one another? "If we think of it graphically, we could say that self-centeredness is to be stationary, static. In self-centeredness we demand that others orbit around us. We will do things and give affection to others, as long as it helps us meet our personal goals and fulfills us.

"The inner life of the triune God, however, is utterly different. the life of the Trinity is characterized not by self-centeredness but by mutually self-giving love. When we delight and serve someone else, we enter into a dynamic orbit around him or her, we center on the interests and desires of the other. That creates a dance, particularly if there are three persons, each of whom move around the other two. So it is, . . . each person of the Trinity loves, adores, defers to, and rejoices in the others. That creates a dynamic, pulsating dance of joy and love."

This truth has profound implications. "If God is triune, then loving relationships in community are the 'great fountain of energy and beauty spurting up at the very center of reality.' (C. S. Lewis, Mere Christianity). . . Ultimate reality is a community of persons who know and love one another. That is what the universe, God, history, and life is all about. If you favour money, power, and accomplishment over human relationships, you will dash yourself on the rocks of reality. . . . You will never get a sense of self by standing still, as it were, and making everything revolve around your needs and interests. Unless you are willing to experience the loss of options and the individual limitation that comes from being in committed relationships, you will remain out of touch with your own nature and the nature of things. . . . The world was made by a God who is a community of persons who have loved each other for all eternity. You were made for mutually self-giving, other-directed love. Self-centeredness destroys the fabric of what God has made."

Moreover, there is a greater personal significance in this truth. "Jonathan Edwards, in reflecting on the interior life of the triune God, concluded that God is infinitely happy. . . . because there is an 'other-orientation' at the heart of his being, because he does not seek his own glory but the glory of others."

This idea creates an apparent conflict with the many references in Scripture to God calling us to glorify and serve Him. The answer is resolved in the reason for this demand. "He wants our joy! He has infinite happiness not through self-centeredness, but through self-giving, other-centered love. And the only way we, who have been created in his image, can have this same joy, is if we center our entire lives around him instead of ourselves. . . . God did not create us to get the cosmic, infinite joy of mutual love and glorification, but to share in it. We were made to join in the dance. . . . We were made to center our lives upon him, to make the purpose and passion of our lives knowing, serving, delighting, and resembling him. This growth in happiness will go eternally, increasing unimaginably (1 Corinthians 2:7-10)."

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The rich will need to live more simply so that the poor may simply live. (Proverbs 31:8-9)

Do Not Be Discouraged by Your Feeble Progress

"No one in this earthly prison of the body has sufficient strength to press on with due eagerness and weakness so weighs down the greater number that, with wavering and limping and even creeping along the ground, they move at a feeble rate. Each one of us, then, proceed according to the measure of his puny capacity and set out on the journey we have begun. No one shall set out so inauspiciously as not daily to make some headway, though it be slight. Therefore, let us not cease so to act that we may make some unceasing progress in the way of the Lord. And let us not despair at the slightness of our success, for even though attainment may not correspond to desire, when today outstrips yesterday the effort is not lost. Only let us look toward our mark with sincere simplicity and aspire to our goal not fondly flattering ourselves nor excusing our own evil deeds, but with continuous effort striving toward this end: that we may surpass ourselves in goodness until we attain to goodness itself. It is this, indeed, that through the whole course of life we seek and follow. But we shall attain it only when we have cast off the weakness of the body and are received into full fellowship with him."

John Calvin, Institutes 3.6.5

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Seek first to understand, then to be understood. Stephen R. Covey (Philippians 2:4)

Smoke by George MacDonald

Lord, I have laid my heart upon thy altar

But cannot get the wood to burn;

It hardly flares ere it begins to falter

And to the dark return.

Old sap, or night-fallen dew, makes damp the fuel;

In vain my breath would flame provoke;

Yet see - at every poor attempt's renewal

To thee ascends the smoke.

'Tis all I have - smoke, failure, foiled endeavour,

Coldness and doubt and palsied lack:

Such as I have I send thee! - perfect Giver,

Send thou thy lightning back.

"Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest upon me." (2 Corinthians 12:9)

M2MS

Whatever you can do with a clean conscience, you can do to the glory of God. No work is so menial that it cannot be rendered as worship. Mark Buchanan in The Rest of God. (Colossians 3:23-24). I drive truck for Jesus.

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Life's a journey, some paths have deep ruts and are very difficult to abandon. Choose wisely! (Colossians 3:1-3)

A Story of Personal Sacrifice

The stories that always seem to move us most deeply are those in which someone faces irremediable loss or death in order to bring life to someone else. John Irving's A Prayer for Owen Meaney is another example of this motivating genre.

It's the story of two friends who grow up in a small town in New Hampshire. One of them, Owen Meaney, is peculiar by his smallness in physical stature, squeeky voice and quirky personality. His whole life is relentlessly moving toward a destiny of personal sacrifice. Irving portrays him as a prophet and ultimately as a messiah. The book is intriguing as the events of Owen's life all move toward a redeeming purpose: he sacrifices his life in order to rescue others. As imperfect as he is, his destiny is fulfilled.

A sub-theme that runs through the book is, for lack of a better description, "armlessness." The native chief who sells his land to the founder of Grave's End, NH, is represented by the graphic of a armless totem pole. Owen removes the arms of the statue of Mary Magdelene. Ultimately, Owen loses both of his arms in his fearless act of heroism.

The story is very moving. It stirs within me a desire to do something of worth in this world; to expend myself for the good of others. However, I find it difficult to follow through with my resolution to live more courageously. My heart's basic patterns stay the same. I am still driven by selfishness and the need for the approval of others. As long as these fears and needs have power over me, all my intentions to change will never be accomplished.

But the Gospel is a different story. it is not just another moving fiction. It is the true story of us. I am the one who is in peril and Jesus has come to give his life to rescue me. Despite my unwillingness to be saved he has taken my place. When I think of what Jesus has done for me I find transforming and liberating strength and inspiration for personal change. The fear and pride that enslave my heart is dislodged. I am humbled by the necessity of his sacrifice. I am thankful and joyful for his desire to willingly give his life in exchange for mine.

The Gospel is unique because Jesus' death is not the end of the story. He is not dead and armless. A Prayer for Owen Meaney concludes with the narrator's longing to have Owen back. He will forever remain an armless dead hero. In Contrast, Jesus is alive and forever remains the one "who holds the seven stars in his right hand" (Revelation 2:1), and the one "who holds the key of David. What he opens no one can shut and what he shuts no one can open" (Revelation 3:7), and the one who "is able to open the scroll and its seven seals" (Revelation 5:5), etc. It is he who Moses refers to with his glorious benediction, "The eternal God is your refuge and underneath are the everlasting arms." (Deuteronomy 33:27).

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Remember in the dark, what you've learned in the light. (Psalm 119:105).

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Life is a journey, not an event. God works in you and others slowly. So slowly, that unless you reflect back, you will never notice the changes.

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"There are many angles at which a man may fall, but there is only one angle at which he can stand straight." G.K.Chesterton (Matt. 7:13-14)

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Without the breath of God man remains mud. (Galatians 2:20)

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Faith is resting in the faithfulness of God. Your faith will falter but His faithfulness will never fail.

This photo of a Canadian Prairie sunrise reminded me of the assuring words of the prophet Jeremiah: "Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, "The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for him." The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the LORD." (Lamentations 3:21-26)

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You are never more like God than when you give of yourself, for God gave us His One and Only Son. (John 3:16)

Calculating God

Just completed reading (listening to) a novel by Robert J. Sawyer: Calculating God. It's a Sci-Fi story about aliens who visit earth on a search for God. The aliens have discovered scientific proof of the existence of god and are on a galactic expedition to find clues that will lead to his whereabouts. One of the visitors is a paleontologist, Hollis, who lands his space craft at the ROM (Royal Ontario Museum) in order to collaborate with a human counterpart. He is introduced to Thomas Jericho who is a scholar on vertebrate fossils. Hollis is bewildered that Thomas, who is an atheist, cannot accept the existence of an intelligent designer of the universe. In one key intercourse Hollis challenges Thomas that his conclusions are based on more than empirical evidence; it is possible that he is being influenced by something else.

Hollis - "What sort of evidence would convince you that there is a god?"

Thomas - "A smoking gun . . .incontrovertible evidence . . . that's what I want . . . indisputable proof."

Hollis - "There is no indisputable proof for the Big Bang and there is none for evolution and yet you accept those. Why hold the question of whether there is a creator to a higher standard?"

Thomas thought, "I didn't have a good answer for that."

Thomas - "All I know is that it will take overwhelming evidence to convince me."

Hollis - "I believe you already have been given overwhelming evidence."

M2MS

When two elephants fight the grass gets trampled. (African proverb). Don't leave conflict unresolved; it will hurt many others. (Romans 12:18).

We Are Like Sheep

We took this photo as we drove through Jasper National Park in Alberta. A herd of mountain sheep had wandered onto the road to get their daily dose of salt. The Trans-Canada highway is the world's longest salt lick! The sheep were so absorbed with their desire for salt that they were completely oblivious to the danger that they had placed themselves in. They didn't even flinch when we blew our truck horn! As I reflected on this situation I was reminded of the words of the prophet Isaiah: "We all, like sheep, have gone astray, each of us has turned to his own way; and the LORD has laid on him the iniquity of us all. (Isaiah 53:6)

When we think about sheep, we get a warm, fuzzy feeling: white, fleecey, soft, cuddly animals that are fun to be with. But when the Bible compares us to sheep it’s really a spiritual insult. the prophet does not use the comparison in a positive way. Two observations emerge from this analogy

A. Like sheep we need to be rescued – we are lost.

Sheep are notoriously single-minded and at the same time unaware of their circumstances. Their minds are on the next clump of grass and not much else. They have been known to eat their way onto the edge of a steep cliff and fall off to their peril. Furthermore, when they are frightened they have a tendency to bolt off in any direction. As a result of these two tendencies, sheep are prone to get lost. Like them, we humans seem not to be much aware of the consequences of our choices.

We tried raising sheep on when we lived on a small property on Breadalbane Rd. We bought a sheep and named her Patty. I had this great idea. Sheep like grass and we have lots of it. Why not use Patty to keep our lawn cut. Put a collar on her and tethered her to a post. She would eat the grass in a spot for a few days and then I would move her to another stop on the lawn, eventually trimming all of the lawn. Problem was Patty only ate grass at the end of her tether. What we ended up with was a lawn with many 30 foot circles. Patty was not content to eat the grass provided for her but wanted the stuff beyond her reach. Like you and I, she was prone to wander.

We were created to live on our Creator. We were meant to feed on the LORD alone. But we take the deepest longings of our soul and focus them on something. If it’s anything or anyone else than God – that’s idolatry. And we will always end up hungry. We are replacing something else for God.

B. Like sheep we are helplessly lost.

A sheep can contribute nothing to its rescue. The shepherd has to do everything. This is traditionally called the doctrine of original sin. We are all born in sin that we inherit from our parents. Children are not born innocent and then we teach them to do wrong. And the doctrine of the total depravity of man teaches that we are utterly lost in our sin and can do nothing to rescue ourselves. Like sheep, we can’t even see our lostness and peril. Hebrews 3:13, warns against the callousness that results from sins deceitfulness. Sin has a deceptive effect on us: we can’t see our own sin; and further, sin has a hardening effect on us: we become insensitive to it.

Like sheep we are hopelessly and helplessly lost in our sin! It would not help to send a great teacher or example that we could follow to reform ourselves. The problem is not lack of information. Jesus said, God has sent the prophets and you killed them all. We must be saved by God’s grace. This is where the Prophet gives us hope. the Lord has provided for our rescue by giving a substitute lamb to be sacrificed in our place: "the LORD has laid on him the iniquity of us all." The shepherd becomes a sheep like us to die in our place and satisfy the justice of God. This is the good news of the Gospel of Christ.

M2MS

"Most of your unhappiness in life is due to the fact that you are listening to yourself instead of talking to yourself." (Martyn Lloyd-Jones, Spiritual Depression) (1 Corinthians 10:5).

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At every stage of your Christian development pride is your greatest enemy and humility is your greatest friend. (John Stott)

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Being good is more important than looking good. (Matthew 6:1-18).

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Many of the right things to do in life are the most difficult things to do. (H. Norman Wright)

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Holiness is all about ownership. You are not your own; you belong to Christ. He has bought you with His own life (1 Peter 1:15-16, 18-19; 2:9-10). Remember who you belong to & live by that reality!

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You should never regret admitting you are wrong (Proverbs 28:13).

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We are naturally blind to our own character flaws. We need people who love us enough to help us see them.

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It is only in giving yourself to others that you truly live (John 12:25).

M2MS 12/16/09

You cannot find what you are looking for in this world, because you were made for something more (Matthew 6:33).

M2MS 12/10/09

There is no neutral! Every moment of your existence you are either advancing into more or retreating into less (2 Thessalonians 1:3).

M2MS 12/07/09

Be careful what you look at! Your eyes are the gateway to your inner self (Matthew 6:22). Once something is in there it's very difficult to get it out.

M2MS 12/04/09

We are at war and the enemy is ruthless and relentless. Always be vigilant! (1 Peter 5:8-9)

M2MS 12/01/09

Good techniques can never replace godly character. (1 Timothy 1:5)

M2MS 11/27/09

When you have sinned, don't allow yourself the luxury of self-pity, run to Jesus for forgiveness! (1 John 1:9)

Disordered Loves

In his Confessions, Augustine of Hippo (354-430 A.D.) defined sin as disordered loves. He was the first to suggest the concept that we all operate from a deficit orientation. This is the idea that we have a hole in our souls and it can only be filled by God. All sin is an attempt to fill the void by loving good, created things, when it can only be filled by the only ultimate thing: the love of God. This is the essence of idolatry: making good things into ultimate things.

When we do this disordered loves have three negative results in our lives: They starve us; they emotionally enslave us; and they divide us.

Augustine suggested that the solution is found in true beauty. There is nothing more beautiful than Christ. As this truth is grasped in our souls we begin to reorder our love toward Christ. Our disordered desires become transformed by the grace of God so that we focus our devotion on Him alone. This is a lifetime process: a journey characterized by repentance and faith. Augustine said, "Our hearts are restless, Lord, till they rest in thee." May my life continually be reoriented to the one who alone is true beauty and satisfaction.

You might want to check out David K. Naugle's book, Reordered Love, Reordered Lives: Learning the Deep Meaning of Happiness.

Perfect Union

"If anyone loves me, he will obey my teaching. My Father will love him and we will come to him and make our home with him." (John 14:23).

"Oh, to be bound up in the bundle of life with the living God and with Christ, who has life in Himself! Oh, let this be the whole strength of the aim of our souls, and let us be so moved and affected with it, so as not to lack a part and share in and with this good company! They were sufficient company to Themselves when They inhabited eternity and They are sufficient to make us so, by taking us up into Their intimate converse. . . . Oh, what sweetness will there be one day in heaven in the fullness of converse and manifestation of these three persons. It will be, if not all, yet the great discourse that will be had and heard in heaven with our poor souls by the three persons, bringing all the delights they have had in you from eternity down into your hearts, and revealing them to you all eternity."

Oh LORD, may I have a taste of this glorious union - never to crave for the dry morsels of this barren world again.

Excerpt from A Habitual Sight of Him: The Christ-Centered Piety of Thomas Brooks.

M2MS 11/25/09

The more proud you get the more you become out of touch with reality. Humility will liberate you from self-deception. (Proverbs 11:2)

M2MS 11/24/09

Keep the main thing the main thing: "For physical training is of some value, but godliness has value for all things. " (1 Timothy 4:7-8)

M2MS 11/18/09

All of life is repentance: the constant process of forsaking wrong and embracing right. (2 Corinthians 7:8-9)

M2MS 11/15/09

Humility is not thinking less of yourself, it is thinking of yourself less. (C.S.L.)

M2MS 11/14/09

Sin is deceptive: it not only makes us sick, but also senseless.

M2MS 11/13/09

"I shall not want." (Psalm 23:1) The secret of contentment in a consumer world is being thankful to the Good Shepherd for EVERYTHING.

M2MS (Memos to My Sons)

A humble attempt to encourage my sons as followers of Jesus. I will try to keep my messages to 25 words. l2l, dad.

started 11/12/09

Change Is Essential

In Herman Melville's Bartleby, The Scrivener, he tells the story of a Wall Street Lawyer who hires a young man named Bartleby as a scrivener. The Lawyer soon discovers that Bartleby is not willing to do anything in the office except his proficient task of copying documents. In time he continues to respond to every request with his signature, "I would prefer not to." One weekend the lawyer discovers that Bartleby was taken up residence in his offices. Eventually the young scrivener is refusing to do his copying tasks. Frustrated, the lawyer tries to convince Bartleby to resume his work or be fired. He responds with, "I would prefer not to at this time." Yet the influential boss is unable to make Bartleby leave. Embarrassed by the comments of business associates who are baffled by the lawyer's inability to deal with the idle employee, the lawyer decides to move his offices to another location. Bartleby remains unmoved at the old office suite until he is finally removed forcefully by the authorities and placed in jail. The lawyer visits him and attempts to extend kindness by providing for his meals. However, even this act is rebuffed by the popular response, "I would prefer not to." Tragically, when the lawyer returns again, he discovers that the young man has starved to death because of his preference.

This story is a graphic reminder that change is essential to life. Life cannot be lived simply by personal preferences. There are truths in this world that are unchangeable and if we do not submit and respond to these with our own change we will die. The greatest truth is that we must accept and obey the will of God. This is the essence of repentance. It is the humble recognition of personal wrong and the desire and will to change by accepting God's way. This is the only path to life. "Godly sorrow brings repentance that leads to salvation and leaves no regret . . . See what this godly sorrow has produced in you: what earnestness, what eagerness to clear yourselves, what indignation, what alarm, what longing, what concern, what readiness to see justice done." (2 Corinthians 7:10-11). Although the act of repentance may be painful and humbling it is still the only way to life and joy.