Along the Way

Contentment

"In repentance and rest is your salvation, in quietness and trust is your strength" Isaiah 30:15.

I am agitated these days. My soul is disturbed by the many crises that friends are facing. I long to be with my soul-mate. Feelings of apathy and exhaustion overwhelm me to the point of weeping. My emotions are fragile. Today, in a crisis moment, I behaved in a way that is uncharacteristic of a follower of Jesus. Things are not as I would like them to be. Last night I read my son-in-law's blog entry and was convicted by the thought that I am discontented. So, today I picked up a book that I had been reading earlier this year. The book was written by a puritan pastor, Jeremiah Burroughs. It is a short paper back, however it has been a rich source of instruction for me along the journey of faith. The title expresses the high view that the author places upon the virtue of contentment: The Rare Jewel of Christian Contentment. I just picked up where the book mark was. The following is an excerpt that challenged me:

Those who are contented are ready to receive mercy from the Lord. If you want a container to take in any liquid, you must hold it still for if the cup stirs and shakes up and down, you cannot pour in anything, but you will say, "hold still," that you may pour it in and not lose any. So if we would be containers to receive God's mercy, and would have the Lord pour his mercy into us, we must have quiet, still hearts. We must not have hearts hurrying up and down in trouble, discontent and vexing, but still and quiet hearts, if we receive mercy from the Lord.

It seems that the more stressful life gets, the more anxious and busy I respond in emotion and behaviour. Why? I think I feel responsible to take control and deal with the problems. But then I feel incompetent, helpless and then worthless. And then the frustration and resentment comes into my heart. The more frustrated I get, the more restless I become. In this self-absorbed state, I am apt to respond in defensive and angry ways when I perceive more problems arising. What a muddled mess I've made simply because of a lack of contentment. I have lost sight of the Lord and his hand controlling every circumstance of my life. Better to stop in an attitude of humility and quietness and think, "Well, it is right that the Lord should do with his poor creatures what he will, I am under his control, and am resolved to do what I can to honour him, and whatever he does with me, I will seek him as long as I live, I will be content with what God gives, and whether he gives or not I will be content." Quietness is necessary for this kind of mindset to be nutrured in my life. I must make time to stop and intentionally set my mind on Christ. It struck me this morning in reading Romans 7 that the battle for godliness is determined in my mind: "in my mind I am a slave of God's law" (v.25). The questions that I must face every day are: Who do I belong to? Who will I give myself to? Stop grumbling for what I don't have and thank God for who he is and what he's doing in my life and others. That's contentment!